When I was a kid, I’d be passive-aggressive in the sense that I wouldn’t let people know how upset I was about things. Thanks to some age and maturity, I don’t have to be that scared kid anymore and not ask what I want.
While signing up a new multiple employer plan up with a pretty good third-party administrator (TPA), I asked whether I could work with a certain automatic rollover provider that I’m fond of. I was told by the TPA that they were fully integrated with another provider so that it was impossible. I pushed back, saying I liked this automatic rollover provider and that it was a better product for the participant and the advisor of the plan. Needless to say, the TPA said they were willing to use the other provider. I knew they would because it’s not like a TPA is making any money off any automatic rollover provider. You can ask and they may say no, but they’re likely to say yes if it’s not going to affect their bottom line.
People aren’t mind readers, if there is something you have in mind with another plan provider, ask them to consider what you want. Otherwise, you’ll never know whether you could have gotten what you wanted.